2 am post

Hello again! Hey all I am up at 2 am can't sleep due to going to the bathroom a lot. That is what chemo does to the body. Also the steriods keep one awake as well. Yeah yesterday was chemo day. So it's going to be a few days of a little hell, but this too shall pass right?! I don't feel to bad at this minute, but it's coming soon. I did have a good day yesterday inspite of chemo. I got some beautiful flowers from a gal named Shelley. I got to be introducded by her yesterday we have been talking on the phone for some time now and she came to see me yesterday. She is such a lovely lady. She had ovarian cancer last year and is doing very well now. So happy for her. I also had of course my dear friend Rosa with me yesterday. My hubby Mark and my nurse navigator Nanette with me too. Oh and of course the sweet nurses Sarah and Vicki. So it was a great day actually. I sure do love the support! Well one more chemo after this and I am done! Whoot Whoot!! Going to be a great day!! I am going to have my kids there when I ring the bell I decided. Because my son asked me today if I get to ring the bell yesterday and I said no not until next time. So yeah I am going to take them out of school so they can see mama is done with chemo next month. It will be a good day for the whole family. Acutally they won't miss any school because they get out at 2 pm and I don't leave there until about 2:30 pm so it's all good. Maybe I'll even let the kids ring it with me. They will get a kick out of that. I can't tell you enough how much my friend is spoiling me so much my dear friend Rosa. She is cleaning my house, cooking dinner for me well I cooked dinner last night felt pretty good to do it. I made a new recipe had to try it out. Rosa gave me a massage last night felt so good getting that chemo to circulate some. I have to drink tons of water too at least for 48 hours after chemo that is what the doctor said to me last treatment. So going to do what he says so I can not have such hella of a time this go around. We'll see if that works. I got a pamplet about the YMCA has a group that excercise while in treatment and who has breast cancer. I called them yesterday and thinking about going to it. It would be so good for me to do that right now. There is free child care too. The kids would love to go and do things as well. I think when I am done with chemo I am going to be a member of the YMCA the kids can swim, do actitives and have tons of fun after school. Well in the meantime I'll go to it now and have some more support. Speaking of the kids they sure do like the CLIMB program they come home and tell me their time there, it's so great. I hope they are learning a lot so proud of them. The bummer part is Brenna is having some separation anxiety right now from mommy and daddy. She doesn't like to see us go bye bye. It breaks my little heart. I don't like to see her like that at all. I hope she gets to be okay with things soon. Connor seems to be doing pretty well with us leaving, but I am sure it bothers him when Brenna cries big crocadile tears. This is been going on now more so that I have been in treatment too and losing my hair poor sweetie she is worried about mommy and even daddy too. She loves us so much and us her. We love our kids so much!! We don't like to see them in pain at all. I hope once chemo is over with she'll feel much better. Only one more month to go. Whew! Well I had a good counseling session with Lesa yesterday she talked about Future tripping she likes to call it that. We all get into the thinking about the future and we need to get in the present. So she gave me some tools to reel myself back into the present. Now some of the future thinking I do is the thought of dying or the bad thoughts that come with having cancer such as going to have those surgeries soon. I do think of good future stuff like my going home and seeing all my friends and family can't wait for that day. Or the high school reunion coming up next year. Those are good future tripping because they keep me motivated on the positive. My dear hubby even had a cousneling session with Lesa and I am so happy they spent a long time together in group too. I am dying to know what types of things were said, but he didn't come out and say too much about his session except about the pamplet he gave me about the YMCA. So that is good. He'll open up to me about it I am sure. I got him another session again for next chemo day too. He just rolls his eyes at me, but he'll do it. I think he enjoyed talking to Lesa so that is a good thing. Mark needs support as well and who else to be giving it to him then her. Well the bills keep rolling in, but Mark said that is just the way it goes right now we have to deal with it. I have to make some calls this morning about all the co-pays we paid last year for taxes. I am gong to be busy with that tomorrow got my work cut out for me. I won't be any good if I don't get back to sleep though. So I best try and sleep again. I'll write more later~ net